Gay-dar?

So why is everyone gay? I was running this morning and this guy pulls out from a side street and kind of glares as me as he makes the turn. He was in one of those old, beat up, loud as hell pick up trucks, and as he passed he really goosed it, made it roar, and when he was past me he let off. Was he trying to impress me? Maybe he's just confused sexually and want to broadcast to anyone and everyone just to see what happens. But I bet he would totally get pissed if someone called him gay. It would be like this:

Them: VRROOOOOOMM!!!!!!
Me: Um…I don’t get it.
Them: Aren’t you impressed? I pushed really hard on the gas pedal! It made a loud noise!!
Me: So, like, what’s the point? I’m not really impressed, because it seems like a monkey could be trained to do that, and I’m not gay so I don’t really get the whole “check me out” thing…
Them: Hey, I’m not gay! What are you trying to say!!??
Me: Well, you’re drawing attention to yourself, I thought, trying to impress me…I just assumed…you know...how do I say this with tact?...I thought maybe you were cruising for some man-ass. I'm flattered and all, but it ain't happening.
Them: Shut up! You don’t know what you’re talking about!!!

Then he would run like a girl with his legs all flying out to the side and his arms all floppy over to his loud car and floor it and peel out with all the smoke and the noise and the hey everyone look at me thing.

Me: See, there, you did it again!! Stop sending mixed messages!